Trial by Fire

Yesterday was my Progress Re-review. It didn't go so bad. There was some concern with the fact that my entire thesis up to this point is based on a single result obtained by another person. But I'm trying to keep faith in the possibility that if I can just get my stuff up and running I will be able to quickly generate enough data to placate their fears. The rest of their comments were about how I seem to be inable to read what I have written. I'm closer to my Ph.D. than to grade school and I still mispell the vast majority of words I write down (as if you couldn't tell). Also, I seem to be rather fond of the complex and indirect grammer which is with the making them of the disposition that is often referred to as confused. My retort is as such: Bah! Simplicity is for women and children!

So now that this is over I can focus on the next sould crushing weight: My admission to candidacy exam. Basically like a progress review on steroids, lots of steroids, and lacking a functional copy of the myostatin gene, oh and both human and bovine growth hormone. And don't forget ill tempered and evil...much like the sea bass.

That is not due till Oct. 1, so I can take advantage of the rest of this week to drink myself into a delerious stupor and forget any of this has happened or is hanging over my head. Oh what fun it is to tread the fine line between self control and self abuse.

Writing.....it's fo' da DEVIL!

I finally finished the rewrite of my progress review and turned it in on Friday. In all fairness it is a better document. However, that is of no comfort to me, writing it was still a bitch.

On the lighter side, Home run derby tonight! woohoo. but this too is tainted by Rudy T taking the laker's job. I am hoping deep down that he is trying to screw it to the team that ruined his career by just laying down and throwing every game he can this season.

Justification of my existence

So being a graduate student I have the things called progress reviews. This a meeting that rolls around every 9 months to a year and for it you are required to write an 8 to 10 page paper that proves you are worth what they are paying you and that you have a plan for at least the near future. You then stand before the three facutly members that make up your thesis committee and discuss the paper for a while.

The problem: Being only a second year grad student, this is my first progress review. Not a huge deal (have to have a first one sooner or later some time right?) but this department is not standardized in the least. All the help I got when I started this was: 8-10 pages single spaces, figures integrated into the text. Those aren't the high points......that's all I got. So I was way stressed by some outside factors the first time I tried this and just put together something that I knew wasn't good but might just be enough to get me by.

It wasn't.

My committee was not happy. Lucky for me, the faculty I have been assigned are not the kind to scream and yell at you. They just let you know that you didn't meet expectation and very kindly say something that amounts to "fix it, or else". And then leave. So here I am trying to redo this using the much more exact specifications given to me by the chair of my committee. Still not fun, but at least it is coming. If I wasn't so damn ADD all the time I could probably just sit down, focus, and do it. But I can't, so I have to take frequent breaks and do things like write this in order to let the urge to kill subside. It will get done, and it will be at least adequate. At least that's what I keep telling myself. If it isn't, then as of monday the title of this blog will probably be something like "the suffering of a fomer grad student who now has a B.S. in a life science which isn't much better than a GED".

p.s. note to aspiring grad students....lot's of writing involved, so if you are like me and have add, dyslexia, and motivational issues......get started on the writing WAY in advance.

~blair