don't be fooled.....

I am a gradstudent. and by gradstudent i mean cheap.

so i was in the grocery store the other day and decided that i wanted some cereal to eat for breakfast. after surveying the vast array of choices i thought i'd go old school for a while and get a box of fruit loops. A cherished childhood memory of exotic birds telling me i should injest simple shapes flavored to almost taste like fruit (and coated in a pound of sugar).

But, as i was working my way back through the soccer moms down the isle toward the checkout i noticed that the store brand offered "fruity loopy O's" in twice the quantity at half the price. I wavered for just a second and thought to myself. "hey, that's a good deal, how bad could anyone screw up fruit loops?"

Oh good God!

this morning my delicate pallet was lambasted with the awfulness of this imposter cereal. the neon caustic mutating colors come right off in milk and stain your fingers, the bowl, and the spoon. They aren't made with sugar, and not a good substitute like nutrisweet or splenda, probably something like lard, or lye. (hey they both have carbons in them, how much different could they taste) or they got lazy and didn't purify their sucrose leaving me to taste the recemic torture that is the scrumptious L- form and the terribly nasty R-form. they were soggy, smelt bad, and not even filling. and what is worse....i still have a metric ton of them left. someone please save me, please.